if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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