i may or may not be watching the land before time
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
