It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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