Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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