its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Randomize
