It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
