Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Bring me that man meat
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
