woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
