its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Randomize
