Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Dick very happy bro
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
