I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
