so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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