The maid of honor just puked.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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