u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize