Where did you get a picture of my penis
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Randomize
