Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Randomize
