i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
