Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
