This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
