Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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