I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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