Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
