is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
