I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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