high people should be assigned attendants
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
