In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Randomize
