quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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