i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
and she was petting her beer can
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
