Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
