I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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