According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
