No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
