Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
