Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I can text with my tongue
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
