I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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