I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
