Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
