Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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