like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
