Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
