Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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