STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize