Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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