My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
