She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
