Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
