So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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