So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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