So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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