now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
