whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
