no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
